to believe in the pattern

for decades now
(possibly more than a half of the whole)
I've witnessed a new morning

why then
it is so difficult to fall asleep at night?

why so hard to believe on
another day?

yet another
of the same

I want to have the same one;
over and over.

every single day.

you're not in this alone

once it took me eleven years
to finish what I started

once I withstood seven
to be approved again

but I will
tie up
all the loose ends
I see them lie in front of me
never lose my sight of them

now,
I am not my father
and I am not my mother, either
but surely enough, you see
I'll be one

I will finish what we started.

I will not give my word for that,
for they don't weigh much
(I've got to know that, and I'm sorry)
instead
I'll give my heart
a third
a third
a third
makes a whole

I can't go blind

not the book I may keep
at my bedside table

not the torch I may hold
to walk my way

not the mirror I may hang
on the hallway

and nevertheless
a story so compelling
a light so bright
a reflection so clear
that I find it impossible
to keep my eyes away from

I can't go on blind
I have to keep on looking